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Every Girl Deserves To Be Fabulous Inc. is an organization aimed to inspire girls to mature into the fabulous woman that God created them to be.

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Be Fab Blog

 

The Be Fab Blog is your place for discussion with articles on a variety of topics including dating and relationships, school, health and wellness, inspiration, news, social media, fashion and style as well as real-life advice.

Filtering by Category: Food For Thought

Social Media: Don't Believe The Hype

Ashley Jefferson

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Social media is everywhere. Instagram, Snapchat, Twitter, Facebook – whichever you prefer, most of us login to at least one of these apps every day and probably multiple times a day. (Yes, I’m guilty too!) We often lose track of how many times we swipe, like, retweet and comment – as we scroll through and refresh our newsfeeds. Social media can be fun – we use it to stay in touch with friends and family, share funny videos, stay up to date on celebrities and sports teams that we like and of course post some selfies and snaps of our own.

However social media can also be a bad thing especially when we let it consume us. Do we spend more time online than doing work? Are we more likely to remember who commented on our photo rather than what we ate for breakfast? Even worst, are we letting social media affect how we feel about ourselves? For instance, if someone posted a selfie and it got more likes than yours – would you let that cause you to question how you look? Or maybe a friend posted a picture in an expensive car, would that make you jealous – even a little bit?

2 Corinthians 10:12 (AMP) says “[…] When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they lack wisdom and behave like fools.”

Just think about it, if you found out that the expensive car in the photo was just a rental or maybe that the selfie was photoshopped, would you feel kind of foolish being jealous? One thing we fail to realize a lot of times is that what people post on social media isn’t always accurate.  I’m not saying that everything that’s posted online is fake but at the end of the day, we all pick and choose what parts of our lives we want to share or not and people can decide to share the truth or to make things up to make their life appear better.

Social media is great - but we can’t be consumed by it and we can’t use it as a means to measure our self-worth. Remember, our worth comes from God and with Him, there’s no comparison.

New Year, New Me?

Ashley Jefferson

"New year, new me!" How many times did you or someone you know say those exact words at the start of a new year. There were probably good intentions behind it and maybe we really want to but how often do we actually change? 

Each year we tell ourselves that next year will be different. We're gonna finally lose weight, we're gonna do better in school, we're gonna really focus on God more, we're gonna do this and we're gonna do that. However, a lot of us end the year in the same place we started - not having made any progress towards bettering ourselves, growing as a person and accomplishing our goals and the cycle continues.  

But why? Why is it that, according to statistics, only 8% of us who make new year's resolutions are actually successful in keeping them? Is it that out goals are too big? Is it that we don't really try? Or maybe because we don't consider everything that it takes.

Anything worth having is worth making sacrifices for. Take professional athletes for example. To be able to make it to the Olympics is a great accomplishment and that's the part we see on the outside. What we don't see are the things they have to give up in order to reach their goal.

Whether it's losing weight or growing closer to God, we can't move forward if we're still holding onto old things. We have to actually let some things go.

Philippians 3:13 (NLT) says “No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead,”

Moving forward requires sacrifice. That means we have to really make up our minds to let go of old habits, old friends, old thoughts, old attitudes and old ways and leave them behind us 2016. Then we can really say "New year, new me" and mean it. 

 

 

#befabulous

What Kind of Reflection Are You?

Ashley Jefferson

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Growing up my mom would say "Remember who you are and to whom you belong."

She would often say this whenever I was going somewhere - whether it was to the mall with friends, maybe out with a guy, or even when I went away to college.

As my parent, she knew that she did her best to teach me right from wrong and to instill in me high standards and morals.

My actions, no matter where I go, ultimately reflect how I was raised and this phrase of hers was basically my mom's way of reminding me not to forget all I've been taught.

As a child, I used to think this saying only applied to me being a reflection of my parents. However as I got older, I realized that I can look at it also as it applies to God.

Genesis 1:27 says "So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them."

God created us in His image and that means we are a reflection of Him too.That's pretty big but the problem is how often have we kept this in mind?

Think about the last time you did something you knew was wrong but chose to do anyway? In doing whatever it was, what kind of reflection were you?

And that's a question we should keep in mind daily: What kind of reflection am I? Because it'll help us everywhere we go and in everything we do, to remember who we are and to Whom we belong.

 

#befabulous

No! For Our Own Good

Ashley Jefferson


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Think about when you were younger and your parents said "no" to that toy you wanted at the store or "no" to staying up past your bedtime or "no" to having candy for breakfast. Not happy with the answer, most kids would probably kick, scream and cry in hopes of getting their way.

Now fast forward to present day and maybe you heard "no" to the job you interviewed for or maybe you heard "no" from the college you applied to or maybe you got a "no" to something you've been praying for.

"No" isn't a word we like to hear at any age especially when it's regarding something we want. But the reality also is that at some point or another, there are a number of ways we will be told "no" in life. And as much as we might want to throw a tantrum like a little kid, we know that's not an option.

Often time hearing "no" can sting and we are left feeling disappointed and rejected. However if we change our perspective, hearing "no" isn't always a bad thing. In fact, sometimes rejection can be a blessing in disguise.

Jeremiah 29:11 says "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

We may not always understand it when it happens but know that inasmuch as God opens doors that no one can shut, He also shuts doors that no one can open. Just like a good parent, His plan is never to hurt us by saying "no." Instead, when He closes a door, it's to lead us to something much better - the open door He's had waiting for us all along.

 

#befabulous

Goodbye to 2015

Ashley Jefferson

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As usual, this time of year is when we start looking back over the people, places, things, and events that shaped our lives in the last 12 months.

Maybe you marked a milestone like starting high school, graduating from college, getting married or starting a new job? Maybe you had to deal with some tough news this year like a tragic accident, an illness, your parents' divorce, or even the death of a relative.

It's safe to say that each of us had our fair share of great memories and some not-so-great ones in 2015. Whether you're happy or not happy with how things turned out, this is traditionally the time when we come up with ideas to make the New Year better.

By making a New Year's Resolution, you're basically making a goal for yourself.  It's something about the New Year that makes us really reflect and look for ways to better ourselves and grow. But why is that? Maybe it's because we realize that another year has gone by and we don't feel as accomplished as we would've liked.

Psalm 90:12 says "So teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom."

The reality is every minute, every day, every year that goes by is time we won't ever get back again. Making a resolution forces us to accept this and be intentional about changing, growing, and becoming a better person.

Change is hard, especially when you're used to doing things a certain way. But seek God about it because He promises to help us. He more than anyone wants to see us grow and mature into the fabulous person He created us to be. The great thing is that we don't even have to wait until the New Year to make that resolution, why waste another second - start now!

 

 #befabulous  

Faith > Feelings

Ashley Jefferson

As females we are naturally emotional. We can cry, get angry, be over-dramatic and then be overjoyed - sometimes all in the same day. Emotions aren't a bad thing, after all it's one of the many things that make us human. But we have to remember not to let our emotions always guide our actions.

The world says to "follow your heart" but how often have your feelings led you to make a decision you later regretted? The Bible reminds us of that in Proverbs 19:21 "Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails."

Our feelings waver, fluctuate, shift and change more than the weather. We weren't meant to let them be our primary source of direction - they are not stable enough. But God is constant, stable, unwavering and unchanging - and we can always depend on Him. 

Think about it, God has been there to wake us up, to protect us, and to bless us in so many ways - each and every day without fail. And yet we put more trust in ourselves and how we feel rather than in Him who already knows what's best.

Trust is hard for most people and that's probably because we've all had situations where our trust was broken. But we have to remember that God isn't the same as people. People fail us every day and we fail ourselves but God cannot fail, has never failed and will never fail. 

It may not be easy but no matter how we feel, it's always better to choose faith in God over our feelings.

 

#befabulous

Choose To Be Different

Ashley Jefferson

Girl, did you know that you weren't just born by accident? Nope not at all!

In fact, each of us has a God-given purpose. While each purpose is unique to each individual, there is one thing they have in common: to make a difference in the world. 

Romans 12:2 says "And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God."

So what does that mean?

Well, as a Christian (a believer and follower of Christ), we can't do the same thing and expect different results (some say that's the definition of insanity).  In order to make a difference, we have to first be different.

Being different means staying home when your friends want you to sneak out. Being different means telling the truth when you little brother or little sister just lied to your parents.

Being different means walking away instead of getting into an argument or a fight. Being different is choosing to do the right thing when the wrong thing is staring you smack dab in the face. 

Sometimes it's hard and sometimes being different can feel uncomfortable but don't worry yourself about trying to fit in when you were born to stand out.

 

#befabulous

Pretty Is As Pretty Does

Ashley Jefferson

You ever met someone and their outfit of the day was fabulous from head to toe but their attitude was horrible and you're left thinking, "How could someone so pretty be so ugly? It reminds me a lot of the phrase "Pretty is as pretty does." I remember hearing some variation of that saying as a kid but it wasn't until I got a little older that it really made sense. 

For all the girls out there who spend the majority of their day in front of a mirror or taking selfies, I've got news for ya - looks aren't everything. No matter how much effort we put into how we look, it's our personality, our character and how we treat people that determines whether or not they want to be around us. 

Yes God created us beautifully and there is nothing wrong with embracing that in our style, hair and makeup. However it becomes a big problem when we put so much effort into the outside that we neglect the inside.

The Bible says in Proverbs 31:30, "Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised."

Ladies we are so much more than our looks. Yes...I'm talking to you - you are more than your 22 inch Brazilian weave, more than your favorite Mac lipstick, more than your fresh out the salon manicure, more than your straight off the runway clothes - yes you are so much more than all of that.

The saying is true - "It's what's on the inside that counts." And nothing counts more on the inside than Jesus Christ. A true relationship with God is the first place you should start. With Him, your true beauty will shine from the inside out.

 

#befabulous

Don't Fake It And Still Expect To Make It

Ashley Jefferson

"Just fake it till you make it!" How many times have you heard this before? It sounds simple enough but that doesn't mean it actually works. Think about it...

If you're coughing and sneezing, by pretending like you're not sick, will you suddenly be all better?

If you're confused about something you learned in school, by pretending like you understand it, will you automatically pass the test?

No matter what the situation is, you can't keep pretending you're okay when you're not - that's called being in denial. 

Ignoring a problem and acting like it's not there is not a solution.  All that does is hurt yourself and potentially those around you in the long run.

Instead what are we to do?

The only way to truly get help for something is to first address that you have a problem in the first place. Know that it's okay to ask for help because that's exactly what God wants us to do.  

1 Peter 5:7 (AMP) says "casting all your cares [all your anxieties, all your worries and all your concerns, once and for all] on Him, for He cares about you [with deepest affection, and watches over you very carefully]."

No matter how big or how small the issue is, God really cares. It could be a class you're struggling with in school to a fight with your friend or much bigger like a major medical crisis or even the death of a family member.  

Whatever it is, don't be in denial and don't try to fake it instead be honest and upfront because asking God for help is the only way to guarantee you'll make it.

 

#befabulous

 

 

Beware of Cuffin Season

Ashley Jefferson

Ahhhh September! It means no more staying up late watching TV for hours but instead getting up early and going back to school. It means trading in summer shorts and sandals for fall sweaters and boots. But those aren't the only things changing.

As the leaves begin to turn pretty shades of orange and the smell of pumpkin spice fills the air, it also means the start of what's called "cuffin season." Hmmm...you know what I'm talking about - it's that time of year when single people look to get in a relationship so they have someone to cuddle up with as the weather gets colder.

As girls, it's hard when you see your friends all coupled up, holding hands, posting pics on Instagram....they look happy, they look in love and you want that too.

Proverbs 4:23 says "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it."

I'm not sure where the whole "cuffin season" idea came from, but one thing's for sure - it's very dangerous, especially when you're young. Think about it, "cuffin season" encourages you to get into a relationship for all the wrong reasons. 

God loves us and doesn't want to see us give our hearts away to this guy and that guy.  That's why we have to be careful. It might seem like fun and games, but jumping into a relationship just satisfy the "lonely bug" is never the answer.

Although "cuffin season" is only meant to be during the fall/winter, what happens in a few short months can lead to long-term heartbreak and who wants that? So girl no matter what time of year it is, never forget to guard your heart.

#befabulous