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Every Girl Deserves To Be Fabulous Inc. is an organization aimed to inspire girls to mature into the fabulous woman that God created them to be.

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Be Fab Blog

 

The Be Fab Blog is your place for discussion with articles on a variety of topics including dating and relationships, school, health and wellness, inspiration, news, social media, fashion and style as well as real-life advice.

Filtering by Tag: emotions

Social Media: Don't Believe The Hype

Ashley Jefferson

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Social media is everywhere. Instagram, Snapchat, Twitter, Facebook – whichever you prefer, most of us login to at least one of these apps every day and probably multiple times a day. (Yes, I’m guilty too!) We often lose track of how many times we swipe, like, retweet and comment – as we scroll through and refresh our newsfeeds. Social media can be fun – we use it to stay in touch with friends and family, share funny videos, stay up to date on celebrities and sports teams that we like and of course post some selfies and snaps of our own.

However social media can also be a bad thing especially when we let it consume us. Do we spend more time online than doing work? Are we more likely to remember who commented on our photo rather than what we ate for breakfast? Even worst, are we letting social media affect how we feel about ourselves? For instance, if someone posted a selfie and it got more likes than yours – would you let that cause you to question how you look? Or maybe a friend posted a picture in an expensive car, would that make you jealous – even a little bit?

2 Corinthians 10:12 (AMP) says “[…] When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they lack wisdom and behave like fools.”

Just think about it, if you found out that the expensive car in the photo was just a rental or maybe that the selfie was photoshopped, would you feel kind of foolish being jealous? One thing we fail to realize a lot of times is that what people post on social media isn’t always accurate.  I’m not saying that everything that’s posted online is fake but at the end of the day, we all pick and choose what parts of our lives we want to share or not and people can decide to share the truth or to make things up to make their life appear better.

Social media is great - but we can’t be consumed by it and we can’t use it as a means to measure our self-worth. Remember, our worth comes from God and with Him, there’s no comparison.

No! For Our Own Good

Ashley Jefferson


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Think about when you were younger and your parents said "no" to that toy you wanted at the store or "no" to staying up past your bedtime or "no" to having candy for breakfast. Not happy with the answer, most kids would probably kick, scream and cry in hopes of getting their way.

Now fast forward to present day and maybe you heard "no" to the job you interviewed for or maybe you heard "no" from the college you applied to or maybe you got a "no" to something you've been praying for.

"No" isn't a word we like to hear at any age especially when it's regarding something we want. But the reality also is that at some point or another, there are a number of ways we will be told "no" in life. And as much as we might want to throw a tantrum like a little kid, we know that's not an option.

Often time hearing "no" can sting and we are left feeling disappointed and rejected. However if we change our perspective, hearing "no" isn't always a bad thing. In fact, sometimes rejection can be a blessing in disguise.

Jeremiah 29:11 says "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

We may not always understand it when it happens but know that inasmuch as God opens doors that no one can shut, He also shuts doors that no one can open. Just like a good parent, His plan is never to hurt us by saying "no." Instead, when He closes a door, it's to lead us to something much better - the open door He's had waiting for us all along.

 

#befabulous

Faith > Feelings

Ashley Jefferson

As females we are naturally emotional. We can cry, get angry, be over-dramatic and then be overjoyed - sometimes all in the same day. Emotions aren't a bad thing, after all it's one of the many things that make us human. But we have to remember not to let our emotions always guide our actions.

The world says to "follow your heart" but how often have your feelings led you to make a decision you later regretted? The Bible reminds us of that in Proverbs 19:21 "Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails."

Our feelings waver, fluctuate, shift and change more than the weather. We weren't meant to let them be our primary source of direction - they are not stable enough. But God is constant, stable, unwavering and unchanging - and we can always depend on Him. 

Think about it, God has been there to wake us up, to protect us, and to bless us in so many ways - each and every day without fail. And yet we put more trust in ourselves and how we feel rather than in Him who already knows what's best.

Trust is hard for most people and that's probably because we've all had situations where our trust was broken. But we have to remember that God isn't the same as people. People fail us every day and we fail ourselves but God cannot fail, has never failed and will never fail. 

It may not be easy but no matter how we feel, it's always better to choose faith in God over our feelings.

 

#befabulous

Don't Fake It And Still Expect To Make It

Ashley Jefferson

"Just fake it till you make it!" How many times have you heard this before? It sounds simple enough but that doesn't mean it actually works. Think about it...

If you're coughing and sneezing, by pretending like you're not sick, will you suddenly be all better?

If you're confused about something you learned in school, by pretending like you understand it, will you automatically pass the test?

No matter what the situation is, you can't keep pretending you're okay when you're not - that's called being in denial. 

Ignoring a problem and acting like it's not there is not a solution.  All that does is hurt yourself and potentially those around you in the long run.

Instead what are we to do?

The only way to truly get help for something is to first address that you have a problem in the first place. Know that it's okay to ask for help because that's exactly what God wants us to do.  

1 Peter 5:7 (AMP) says "casting all your cares [all your anxieties, all your worries and all your concerns, once and for all] on Him, for He cares about you [with deepest affection, and watches over you very carefully]."

No matter how big or how small the issue is, God really cares. It could be a class you're struggling with in school to a fight with your friend or much bigger like a major medical crisis or even the death of a family member.  

Whatever it is, don't be in denial and don't try to fake it instead be honest and upfront because asking God for help is the only way to guarantee you'll make it.

 

#befabulous

 

 

Be Careful What You Say

Ashley Jefferson

Have you ever listened to someone talk and every other word was a curse word? Maybe they were telling a story about something, maybe they were arguing with someone, maybe they were just singing along to their favorite song?

This might offend some people but...cursing doesn't make you grown, it doesn't make you cool, it doesn't make you a lady, and it's just not cute. People try to justify it saying that sometimes it's necessary to get your point across but the reality it...it's just wrong.

James 3:10 says, "Out of the same mouth proceed blessing and cursing. My brethren these things ought not to be so." 

Think about it: Yes, God gave us a mouth to speak with but why would He want us to use it for negative things like cursing, talking about someone, making fun of someone, etc? God intended us to use our words in a positive way and that's what we need to do.

I understand that, like many other things, it can be a hard habit to break. However I challenge you the next time you get mad or the next time you want to tell someone off, to think twice and choose your words carefully.

#befabulous

Help Me! I'm Drowning

Ashley Jefferson

Have you ever wanted something so bad that you would do almost anything to have it?

Maybe you compromised yourself to get that guy to notice you...maybe you cheated on a test to get a passing grade...maybe you lied during an interview to get a job?

We've all had times where we were so focused on getting what we wanted that we let ourselves get lost in the process. We convince ourselves that since it's not bad to want a boyfriend, a good grade or a job that it's okay to go for it.

Yes it's okay to want these things but it's not okay when we are willing to get them - by ANY means necessary.

Proverbs 19:21 says, "Many are the plans in a person's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails."

Trying to get what we want - in our own way and without seeking God - leaves us feeling exhausted, stressed and overwhelmed. Think about it - it's like we're drowning - drowning in the very thing we wanted to so much.

God loves us too much to let us drown in the very thing we thought was so good for us. Yes, at times He'll let us go into the water without a life jacket but just when we think we're in too deep, and the water starts to cover our heads, He's right there to rescue us before we drown.

I know what you're thinking...yes of course God could stop us from going into the water and getting in over our heads in the first place. However remember that God is our Heavenly Father and even our earthly parents known that sometimes the only way we learn is the hard way. 

 

#befabulous

Broken Into Beautiful

Ashley Jefferson

Mistakes - we all make them and we do it everyday. Maybe we've disappointed our parents, our friends, our boss - or worse we've disappointed God. The question isn't how many times we mess up but how often we think it's the end of the world, how often we let a mistake make us feel like a failure?

Psalm 139:16 tells us, "You're eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed. And in Your book they all were written, the days fashioned for me, when as yet there were none of them."

What a wonderful picture - God forming each and every one of us uniquely and intricately. He knows us inside and out. That means think about this - before we were even born, God knew that we would mess up and drop the ball, yet He still chose to grace you and me with precious life.

Remember that nothing is too big or too small to stop Him from loving us. No matter what it is, we must genuinely come to Him in repentance and surrender all of our mess to Him. Mistakes, failures and all - He can use even the most broken life and turn it into something beautiful.

 

#befabulous

Who Really Has The Keys?

Ashley Jefferson

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Picture this: You texted that guy you've been eyeing for months and you're waiting for him to text you back. 5 minutes turns into 10 minutes which turns into 15 minutes and before you know it - a whole hours has passed by and still no reply.

So how do you respond? Do you start worrying, saying to yourself, "Why didn't he respond? Is he ignoring me? Is he with someone else?"

Or do you get mad and start talking bad about him, saying, "I can't believe he didn't respond! He's such a [insert a name here] and he's not that cute anyway!"

Or do you not let it bother you at all? (Be honest, I know I'm not the only one who has chosen one of the first 2 before) As females, we are naturally emotional - and it isn't just during that time of the month. But if we are honest with ourselves, too often we let our emotions be determined by people.

Psalm 118:8 says, "It is better to trust in the Lord than to put confidence in man."

That means we can't let our days be made or ruined by the actions of others. We can't control people but we can control how we choose to respond to them - even when they don't do the things we want them to.

We weren't made to depend on people - people are wishy-washy, they change more than the weather. Yes the guy you like starts out saying all the right things but he will eventually do something that irks you. On the other hand, God is truly dependable. He is constant - He is the same yesterday, today and forever (see Hebrews 13:8).  Therefore let's pickpocket the person who we gave the keys to and put the key to our happiness, the key to our hearts into the hands of God - He's the rightful owner anyway.

 

#befabulous