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Every Girl Deserves To Be Fabulous Inc. is an organization aimed to inspire girls to mature into the fabulous woman that God created them to be.

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Be Fab Blog

 

The Be Fab Blog is your place for discussion with articles on a variety of topics including dating and relationships, school, health and wellness, inspiration, news, social media, fashion and style as well as real-life advice.

Filtering by Tag: life

New Year, New Me?

Ashley Jefferson

"New year, new me!" How many times did you or someone you know say those exact words at the start of a new year. There were probably good intentions behind it and maybe we really want to but how often do we actually change? 

Each year we tell ourselves that next year will be different. We're gonna finally lose weight, we're gonna do better in school, we're gonna really focus on God more, we're gonna do this and we're gonna do that. However, a lot of us end the year in the same place we started - not having made any progress towards bettering ourselves, growing as a person and accomplishing our goals and the cycle continues.  

But why? Why is it that, according to statistics, only 8% of us who make new year's resolutions are actually successful in keeping them? Is it that out goals are too big? Is it that we don't really try? Or maybe because we don't consider everything that it takes.

Anything worth having is worth making sacrifices for. Take professional athletes for example. To be able to make it to the Olympics is a great accomplishment and that's the part we see on the outside. What we don't see are the things they have to give up in order to reach their goal.

Whether it's losing weight or growing closer to God, we can't move forward if we're still holding onto old things. We have to actually let some things go.

Philippians 3:13 (NLT) says “No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead,”

Moving forward requires sacrifice. That means we have to really make up our minds to let go of old habits, old friends, old thoughts, old attitudes and old ways and leave them behind us 2016. Then we can really say "New year, new me" and mean it. 

 

 

#befabulous

Accomplishing Your #LifeGoals

Ashley Jefferson

#LifeGoals - everybody has them right?  Maybe you want to finish high school and go to college? Maybe you want to start your own business? Maybe you want to be a doctor? Maybe you want to travel? Whatever goals you've set, when you're young sometimes you can't quite see all the necessary steps it will take to accomplish them. Whether you've got a list a mile long or you're still not sure what you want to do, there are three key factors to keep in mind when it comes to reaching your goals:

1. Keep God First: You are not here by accident - God created you for a reason. Think about your gifts, talents and the things you enjoy doing. He put those in you as tools to use to fulfill your purpose and to accomplish your goals. But you have to keep Him first in order to be successful.

2. Get Your Education: School doesn’t stop at high school, that’s just the first step. College is a great next step. Yes it can be expensive but there are many options that can help. (Ex: Going to community college for 2 years then transferring to finish up your last 2 years). Other options include trade/vocational schools as well. Whether you want to be an entrepreneur, an artist, a lawyer or anything else, education is key. How can you be successful in something without first being knowledgeable?

3. Stay Focused: There are so many different things that can distract you. Think about the choices you make, because there will always be a consequence to your actions. One decision (good or bad) can affect the rest of your life.

·      Friends: Choose your friends wisely and don’t get caught up hanging with the wrong crowd. Make sure you surround yourself with people who influence you in a positive way.

·      Boys: Don’t be fooled, they really do come and go and it’s not the end of the world when they leave. Don’t let a relationship hold you back from your future. If someone really loves you, they wouldn’t want to distract you but they would support you in accomplishing your goals.

Jeremiah 29:11 says "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord. “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." At the end of the day, remember that God's got your back. So no matter how hard it gets, how far away your goals seem or how many people tell you it's impossible, do not get discouraged but keep pushing and He will make your dreams a reality.

 

 #befabulous

 

No! For Our Own Good

Ashley Jefferson


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Think about when you were younger and your parents said "no" to that toy you wanted at the store or "no" to staying up past your bedtime or "no" to having candy for breakfast. Not happy with the answer, most kids would probably kick, scream and cry in hopes of getting their way.

Now fast forward to present day and maybe you heard "no" to the job you interviewed for or maybe you heard "no" from the college you applied to or maybe you got a "no" to something you've been praying for.

"No" isn't a word we like to hear at any age especially when it's regarding something we want. But the reality also is that at some point or another, there are a number of ways we will be told "no" in life. And as much as we might want to throw a tantrum like a little kid, we know that's not an option.

Often time hearing "no" can sting and we are left feeling disappointed and rejected. However if we change our perspective, hearing "no" isn't always a bad thing. In fact, sometimes rejection can be a blessing in disguise.

Jeremiah 29:11 says "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

We may not always understand it when it happens but know that inasmuch as God opens doors that no one can shut, He also shuts doors that no one can open. Just like a good parent, His plan is never to hurt us by saying "no." Instead, when He closes a door, it's to lead us to something much better - the open door He's had waiting for us all along.

 

#befabulous

Faith > Feelings

Ashley Jefferson

As females we are naturally emotional. We can cry, get angry, be over-dramatic and then be overjoyed - sometimes all in the same day. Emotions aren't a bad thing, after all it's one of the many things that make us human. But we have to remember not to let our emotions always guide our actions.

The world says to "follow your heart" but how often have your feelings led you to make a decision you later regretted? The Bible reminds us of that in Proverbs 19:21 "Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails."

Our feelings waver, fluctuate, shift and change more than the weather. We weren't meant to let them be our primary source of direction - they are not stable enough. But God is constant, stable, unwavering and unchanging - and we can always depend on Him. 

Think about it, God has been there to wake us up, to protect us, and to bless us in so many ways - each and every day without fail. And yet we put more trust in ourselves and how we feel rather than in Him who already knows what's best.

Trust is hard for most people and that's probably because we've all had situations where our trust was broken. But we have to remember that God isn't the same as people. People fail us every day and we fail ourselves but God cannot fail, has never failed and will never fail. 

It may not be easy but no matter how we feel, it's always better to choose faith in God over our feelings.

 

#befabulous

Be Careful What You Say

Ashley Jefferson

Have you ever listened to someone talk and every other word was a curse word? Maybe they were telling a story about something, maybe they were arguing with someone, maybe they were just singing along to their favorite song?

This might offend some people but...cursing doesn't make you grown, it doesn't make you cool, it doesn't make you a lady, and it's just not cute. People try to justify it saying that sometimes it's necessary to get your point across but the reality it...it's just wrong.

James 3:10 says, "Out of the same mouth proceed blessing and cursing. My brethren these things ought not to be so." 

Think about it: Yes, God gave us a mouth to speak with but why would He want us to use it for negative things like cursing, talking about someone, making fun of someone, etc? God intended us to use our words in a positive way and that's what we need to do.

I understand that, like many other things, it can be a hard habit to break. However I challenge you the next time you get mad or the next time you want to tell someone off, to think twice and choose your words carefully.

#befabulous

Help Me! I'm Drowning

Ashley Jefferson

Have you ever wanted something so bad that you would do almost anything to have it?

Maybe you compromised yourself to get that guy to notice you...maybe you cheated on a test to get a passing grade...maybe you lied during an interview to get a job?

We've all had times where we were so focused on getting what we wanted that we let ourselves get lost in the process. We convince ourselves that since it's not bad to want a boyfriend, a good grade or a job that it's okay to go for it.

Yes it's okay to want these things but it's not okay when we are willing to get them - by ANY means necessary.

Proverbs 19:21 says, "Many are the plans in a person's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails."

Trying to get what we want - in our own way and without seeking God - leaves us feeling exhausted, stressed and overwhelmed. Think about it - it's like we're drowning - drowning in the very thing we wanted to so much.

God loves us too much to let us drown in the very thing we thought was so good for us. Yes, at times He'll let us go into the water without a life jacket but just when we think we're in too deep, and the water starts to cover our heads, He's right there to rescue us before we drown.

I know what you're thinking...yes of course God could stop us from going into the water and getting in over our heads in the first place. However remember that God is our Heavenly Father and even our earthly parents known that sometimes the only way we learn is the hard way. 

 

#befabulous

Life Is Too Short To Waste

Ashley Jefferson

How many times have you heard, "Oh but you're young - you have your whole life ahead of you." 

When you're young, it's very easy to take life for granted. You wake up, go to school or work, hang out your friends, spend time with your family, spend hours on Instagram or watching Netflix, and go about your typical day again and again. At 13, 15 or even 18 you might figure that you'll live to be at least 70 or 80 - but really that's no guarantee.

Last month, a 17-year-old and an 18-year-old - both high school students in Texas - were killed in a fiery car accident. About two weeks ago,  a family friend's son died from cancer. Just last week, a 2-year-old girl was found dead in rural Pennsylvania. 

People die every day - young and old.  The truth is: Yes we do have our whole lives ahead of us, but none of us actually know how long that is. That's a reality not meant to be scary but meant to make you think - what am I actually doing with my time?

Ephesians 5:15-16 says "Be very careful, then, how you live - not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil."

I love the part where it urges us to make the most of every opportunity. Each day, each breath really is a blessing. The thing about time is -  it's so precious and once it's used up, we won't get it back. So why waste it? Let's instead cherish our time and remember to live each moment keeping God first.

#befabulous

 

Clouds Can't Stop The Sun

Ashley Jefferson

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I hopped in the car and was on my way to work on a Saturday afternoon. Although work wasn't where I wanted to be headed, I tried my best to have a positive attitude about it. It was nice and warm when I got in the car but about 10 minutes into my drive, the clouds thickened up and it started to rain. Now it wasn't the wild thunderstorm type of rain - more of a steady sprinkle - but it was still raining nonetheless.

As I continued on my way, I drove by people out walking, suddenly scrambling to take cover. I drove by people at a park, suddenly scrambling to get to their cars. I drove by an outdoor flea market with sellers suddenly scrambling to pack up their merchandise. All this because of the rain.

Now as I continued driving, I looked up and peaking through the rain clouds was a glimmer of the sun.  There in that moment God taught me a lesson. The sun was out all this time but all people were focused on was the rain. How often is that the case in life? Got problems? Don't we all - but even in the darkest of days, there is still sun.

The Bible says in Romans 8:28 (NKJV) "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose."

No matter what may happen in life, there is always something good in it. Sometimes we can't see it - but other times we don't see it because we're focused on the wrong thing. Instead of letting things upset us, or make us angry, worried or afraid, if we stop for a second and look hard enough, we'll see that even the rain can't stop the sun from peeking through.

 

#befabulous

 

Broken Into Beautiful

Ashley Jefferson

Mistakes - we all make them and we do it everyday. Maybe we've disappointed our parents, our friends, our boss - or worse we've disappointed God. The question isn't how many times we mess up but how often we think it's the end of the world, how often we let a mistake make us feel like a failure?

Psalm 139:16 tells us, "You're eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed. And in Your book they all were written, the days fashioned for me, when as yet there were none of them."

What a wonderful picture - God forming each and every one of us uniquely and intricately. He knows us inside and out. That means think about this - before we were even born, God knew that we would mess up and drop the ball, yet He still chose to grace you and me with precious life.

Remember that nothing is too big or too small to stop Him from loving us. No matter what it is, we must genuinely come to Him in repentance and surrender all of our mess to Him. Mistakes, failures and all - He can use even the most broken life and turn it into something beautiful.

 

#befabulous

Who Really Has The Keys?

Ashley Jefferson

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Picture this: You texted that guy you've been eyeing for months and you're waiting for him to text you back. 5 minutes turns into 10 minutes which turns into 15 minutes and before you know it - a whole hours has passed by and still no reply.

So how do you respond? Do you start worrying, saying to yourself, "Why didn't he respond? Is he ignoring me? Is he with someone else?"

Or do you get mad and start talking bad about him, saying, "I can't believe he didn't respond! He's such a [insert a name here] and he's not that cute anyway!"

Or do you not let it bother you at all? (Be honest, I know I'm not the only one who has chosen one of the first 2 before) As females, we are naturally emotional - and it isn't just during that time of the month. But if we are honest with ourselves, too often we let our emotions be determined by people.

Psalm 118:8 says, "It is better to trust in the Lord than to put confidence in man."

That means we can't let our days be made or ruined by the actions of others. We can't control people but we can control how we choose to respond to them - even when they don't do the things we want them to.

We weren't made to depend on people - people are wishy-washy, they change more than the weather. Yes the guy you like starts out saying all the right things but he will eventually do something that irks you. On the other hand, God is truly dependable. He is constant - He is the same yesterday, today and forever (see Hebrews 13:8).  Therefore let's pickpocket the person who we gave the keys to and put the key to our happiness, the key to our hearts into the hands of God - He's the rightful owner anyway.

 

#befabulous